Updated
Updated · The New York Times · Jun 3
Kait Granger Builds Grief Community on TikTok 3 Years After Her Mother's Murder
Updated
Updated · The New York Times · Jun 3

Kait Granger Builds Grief Community on TikTok 3 Years After Her Mother's Murder

1 articles · Updated · The New York Times · Jun 3

Summary

  • Three years after her mother was killed by her father in 2019, Kait Granger posted on TikTok that she "don't think I'll ever be okay" — and the video went viral.
  • That post followed years of trying to appear recovered: she entered a counseling master's program, rushed into marriage weeks after the death, and later said the life she built felt like a performance.
  • TikTok comments from people grieving parents 4 and 6 years after their own losses gave Granger a sense of purpose after she had been waking up wondering why she was still here.
  • She kept posting about ordinary routines, antidepressants, poetry and her divorce, turning the tagline "let's not rot" into a small online community for people processing grief outside traditional settings.

Insights

When public grieving goes viral, does it truly heal or create a new performance pressure?
As social media becomes a grief outlet, how can we separate authentic support from digital misinformation?
How does profound trauma biologically rewire our need for connection and drive life-altering decisions?