R. Eric Thomas advises adoptive parent on telling birth grandmother the truth

11 articles · Updated · MLive.com · May 9

The parent said the child was adopted at about one week old through an agency after the birth mother, who later died of an overdose, signed away her rights.
Thomas urged the parent to explain that the agency acted as intermediary and that they never met the birth mother, while still acknowledging gratitude for her decision.
He said the grandmother may be using a comforting narrative to process grief, and that learning the fuller story need not erase her pride in her daughter's final act.

When a white lie soothes a grandparent's grief, who ultimately pays the price for the secret?

In adoption's complex emotional world, is a painful truth always better than a comforting lie?