Therapist Tells 27-Year-Old She Is Not Behind After 6 Friendless Years

1 articles · Updated · The Washington Post · May 28

A 27-year-old with a master’s degree asked therapist Sahaj how to feel lighter after years of loneliness, singleness and grief over a late nonverbal learning disorder diagnosis.
Sahaj said the core issue was not lack of achievement but emotional undersupport: a controlling mother’s fear became infantilization, while bullying, trust issues and undiagnosed neurodivergence limited autonomy and social practice.
The advice focused on separating grief, anger and loneliness into different needs — tenderness, boundaries and repeated social exposure — rather than treating them as proof she is permanently behind.
Sahaj urged small, repeated acts of independence and purposeful rejection practice, such as deepening existing ties, trying new hobbies or asking someone for coffee, to build trust and confidence.
The broader message was that missing milestones in college or the early 20s — including 2 pandemic years after graduating in 2020 — does not mean her chance at friendship, dating or adulthood has passed.

Is 'practicing rejection' a realistic solution for a generation already paralyzed by social anxiety and loneliness?

If half of adults feel isolated, is feeling 'behind' an individual failure or a symptom of a broken society?

How can adults escape the shadow of helicopter parents when a late diagnosis complicates their path to independence?